Easy Bake Oven Stress Test (Parenting PSA)

My wife recently entered the Easy Bake fray and in honor of her service I am reposting my experiences with this contraption:

I have just completed my 2nd baking extravaganza with my 8, 6, and 4 year old and I must say there ain’t nothing Easy about baking a palm sized cake with an Easy Bake Oven. Add a Dad who is a safety nut with three danger averse kids for extra fun. Let’s see the math:

Preheat (while mixing cake batter):
15 minutes

Bake:
12 minutes

Cool Down (while mixing frosting):
10 minutes

Remove cake from pan/apply frosting/shred cake to pieces:
2 minutes

Amount of time it takes for 3 kids to eat palm sized shrapnel cake:
41 seconds

39 minutes of preparation, leads to 41 seconds of eating time? And I have not tasted a piece of cake yet? Man, I love my kids.

Average times I need to say “Don’t touch the oven!”:
Roughly 12

Average times I need to say “No, it is not time yet.”:
Roughly 50

Parental recovery time and cleanup:
10 minutes

Cost of one packet of cake mix:
$5.50

Don’t get me wrong, in the end my kid’s enjoyed themselves thoroughly and I do not regret a thing. I just had no idea what I was getting myself into when I put that bad boy in the cart.

Consider this a public service announcement to any unsuspecting parents out there.

God bless,

Eric